Before we look ahead, I want to look back for a moment. It’s good to remember where you’ve been before you embrace where you’re going.
I grew up in the Midwest. We lived on a basic street in a blue-collar neighborhood. There was a park (it’s still there) about three blocks away where my buddies, Bruce, Brian, Bob, Ron and I would play. Right across the street was a neighborhood market. It was certainly handy when we ran low on milk!
There was nothing spectacular about our house or particularly notable about the people on Fifth Street, but it was home. Ron, my best friend, lived around the corner. Brian and Bob lived within a couple of blocks. We hung out together with some kind of unwritten understanding of when we’d get together, whose house we’d meet at, and yes, we always knew to be home before dinner (or dark).
Hamilton Elementary School was about half a mile away. My sisters, brother, and I would easily merge into the stream of kids walking in groups of twos and threes as we made our way together each morning and reverse the process of coming home each afternoon. I don’t recall anyone complaining about having to walk to school. We just did.
Sundays were church days. No discussions. Church is just what you did. God always had a prominent place in setting the stage for the coming week. As a boy, our service always seemed long as we sat on hard, unyielding, wooden pews! Later in life, I heard the experience described perfectly. “The mind can only absorb what the seat can endure.” I learned that lesson early on!
My world was rocked in fifth grade when my folks got the wild idea (wild to me anyway) that we should move. They found an old, run-down farmhouse – a “fixer-upper.” After a short time, they discovered it was far more work than they had bargained for. Even though it wasn’t any further from school, it was a new area and was a big change. We still walked to school, but now, our path was from another direction. It was mostly through the woods and much more treacherous than the well-traveled paved streets we were used to! (Especially in the winter months).
A couple of acres of land came with the house and our location was really a game changer. We had a menagerie of pets – dogs, horses, rabbits, cats, turtles, etc. We could also ride go-carts, swing on the tire swing, shoot off model rockets, and have sleepovers down the hill by the creek. Campfires and all kinds of family get-togethers happened on that property. Lots of great memories!
Dad still lives in there, in that old house. He’s alone now. Mom entered Heaven just over two years ago, after they had shared 69 years together, four kids, a couple of hundred foster children together, and countless memories. Dad will be 94 on January 28th. He was just in the hospital and received a couple of stents. Five days, later he was back at Planet Fitness. (He’s doing great.)
My grandmother (we just called “Granny”) was the quintessential definition of a grandmother. Granny’s house was always welcoming and the place the family would traditionally gather on Thanksgiving Day. In my mind, I can hear the distinctive sound of her backdoor opening and the incredible medley of smells that would envelop us on upon arrival. My mouth waters just thinking about it! Those gatherings were always special. Full of favorite foods, and tons of laughter. The first time I experienced a “jolt” of change on Thanksgiving, was the year my folks were on a missionary trip and spent that day serving in Africa. It was very different having them so close in thought and yet, physically on the other side of the planet.
There have been many changes in our family (like yours) over the years. Moves, job changes, marriages, kids, divorce, and illnesses, all have been part of our family experiences. When Granny was welcomed into Heaven in 1995, our decades-old family tradition came to an end.
As you begin thinking about the coming year, may I encourage you to do a couple of things?
- Personally prepare. Take a few minutes to reflect on your past. Remember the special times, but also remind yourself that there are no duplicates. Every year will be different.
- Adjust your Expectations. I’m not certain if we need to lower our expectations, or just go through the year “wide open” and ready for whatever comes? You get to decide.
- Choose to focus on others! There will always be a family member (or two!) that brings a dose of friction with them. Prepare yourself. Decide ahead of time to be extra kind when you do have time together. Look for ways to serve your family. Everything goes better when you do!
- Remember the moments make the memories! God has uniquely made you and specifically designed the uniqueness of your family and friends. Embrace the differences. PEOPLE are what matter most. When you’re together, really be present. Your presence is one of the greatest gifts you can offer someone.
- Expect the unexpected. Things will happen that are way outside of your control. And perhaps, your comfort zone. You will get through it all and it will quickly be a memory. Why not choose to make it a good one?
- Be thankful. Every day. Choose to grow an “attitude of gratitude.” As the saying goes, “Suppose you woke up tomorrow with only the things you thanked God for today?”
I glance back at my past and I am forever grateful. God has always been there. He’s always provided. “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.” (Hebrews 13:8) Ask for his help in cultivating a big-picture perspective and a thankful heart.
One of my “chores” at home is to transfer birthday and anniversary information over to a new calendar. That task is done. The adventure of a new year and new opportunities is about to begin. With God, the BEST is always yet to come! Hang on for new adventures and opportunities.
